im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
We legitimately thought something was wrong with you until someone pointed out you were just doing the thriller dance
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
IT'S LIKE SHE TAKES SECRET KUNG FU CUNT LESSONS AND THEN BRUCE LEES ALL OVER EVERYONE.
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
MIDGETS
????
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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