Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
"I could never have "feelings" for someone who, at one point, wanted to "hate fuck" my face."
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Dude, I brought the fucking tequila to that party and they cheered for the chick that seriously only brought limes.
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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