He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Getting stoned and sitting front row in a legal class.. Not my best idea
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Ya’ll! My debit card got switched with my boss’ at lunch today (both Red Wells Fargo)....I realized it at whole foods AFTER I ran it for $100 at Vanity Room getting my vaj waxed 🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️🤦🏻♀️. Most awkward IOU ever tomorrow.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Damn, I just did coke with a dude in a bathroom and after he took his dick out right in front of me and took a piss. What a power move.
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