I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
You know in a few years she's gonna look like her mom. So if you're gonna hit that you better do it while she still looks like somebody else.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
