We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
Driving with balloons in your car is more annoying than that bubble fart that doesn't leave your ass after your previous fart.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Randomize
