I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
You just kept yelling "you ain't got no pancake mix." to the tv screen
Just puked. First it was bright neon blue then it turned to bright lime green. How does that even happen? And wtf was I drinkin last night?
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
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