idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
You don't know what lonely is until you've came in an Arby's Napkin
You know when your cat drags a dead bird into the the house as a present and drops it at your feet looking all pleased because it thinks you'll be pleased? That's what sex with him was like.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
Randomize
