Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
tell me about the eggs
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
