While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
i sent him a nude and he responded 6 hours later
what did he say?
"oh m god,,, whow '!!!!nm"
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
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