You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
Watching Blossom reruns on YouTube. Eating Pringles dipped in hot chocolate. Not taking this breakup well.
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
Just high enough for therapy.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
I haven't had sex since the Vanilla Ice concert
Please don't have sex ever again just so you can say that forever.
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
Randomize