There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Accidentally searched up "pizza pasties" instead of "pizza pastries". I was not disappointed.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
