wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
just had to take a 4 hour nap to write a one page paper. its obviously the week after winter break.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
we're almost there. Shes pounding on the car window telling the nurse whos on a smoke break to fuck off.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
I'm sorry for biting your husband's ass last night.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
Randomize
