then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
Honestly, your dog is in better hands with that homeless guy.
He won't let me have sex with him, but feels bad if I won't let him get me off. It is the weirdest, best, most confusing pseudo relationship I've been in.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
Randomize