Banned from zoo.
Again?
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
yeah that's what i said...you fucked him and peed on his comforter
yeah well...Like any great yacht, I leave a wake
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Randomize
