I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
Found a left over fake Olympic medal from our party last weekend. Awarded it to a random girl in the bar last night. Its the only thing she was wearing this morning when she woke up at my place.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
Half of elefante. Gelafin galaxy
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
Dying on my bathroom floor at 7 am, I would rather be eaten by a shark right now
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
shes rolling around in the floor yelling my vagina hates me
Randomize
