i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Bad news. I lost my teeth. Good news. I can still take a guy home sans teeth.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Dude when the cops came you ran through the fence. Fucking THROUGH it. You're a master ditcher.
You told him he looked like Jesus and that you wanted to fuck his face, I'd say your blind date went well
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
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