my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
I think I just fucked my first person born during the Clinton administration
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
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