i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
Randomize
