you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
A hangover is a type of food poisoning. Makes me feel better about calling out of work.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Im pretty sure at one point a very high you yelled, with actual tears in your eyes, "im not wrestling with you anymore, you dont respect my safe word!!"
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
Randomize
