so explain again why im purple
no
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
And when he pulled me off the bathroom floor, he just looked at the cat litter stuck to my chin and said "oh sweetie" and shook his head. I think my dad's officially given up hope.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
Shit my boyfriend's roommate thinks thinks: I love getting woken up to the sound of my roommate getting a blowjob
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
The hair on my legs is officially flapping in the breeze when I walk. I must say, being single does have perks and this is one of them.
Drink water, eat food, and stop tazing yourself
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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