He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Why do you need me to cover for work?
I wouldn't say NEED but lets just say I smell like guacamole and semen.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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