He introduced her to the DMA meeting by saying: in the past few years i've never seen someone work so hard for so little success
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize
