Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
why are there beer bottles in my dishwasher?
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
When the officer tried to stop you, you just shouted your name in his face. repeatedly.
1 in 5 deaths i nrussia is alcohol related. GO MOTHERLAND
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
After she lost the bet I made her get on one knee so she could "Te-blow me"
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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