we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
You know, it doesn't really count as a walk of shame if you guys showered together the next morning
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
I really want to throw this drink in your face but it was 6 dollars that shits expensive
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Randomize
