Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
Pulling over on the side of the road to set off fireworks was the worst idea you have ever had. I don't care if it was called a friendship pagoda.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
Randomize