Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
We walked because you started screaming when you finally realized he wasn't Ben Bailey and it wasn't the Cash Cab.
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
