Just mADE A PArabola og urine
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
obviously you don't know the college version of myself. if there's something i'm ALWAYS willing to put up for it's alcohol.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
annnnd thats why you don't tip your waiter by flashing them
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
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