He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
she called me screaming that i shouldn't ignore her phone calls, because she's not trying to get me to hang out with her and she doesn't want to be my girlfriend, she just wants sex.
what did you do?
i asked her out. that's so hot.
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
You are very nonchalant about the high probability of us having an orgy.
Eh, I'm ok with this, this can work. We're the best kind of the worst people.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I need a costume for that party. Even if I'm just taking it off.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
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