Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
i told you the emergency thong was a good idea.
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I think i was just meant to be a stripper. A ballerina stripper cat
I try not to have friends with attractive fathers, it only brings my morals down.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
Randomize
