we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
did i walk over a car last night?
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
Nice people suck dick too. I'm proof.
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
Randomize