That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
It was inevitable. It was like I was a caterpillar and now I'm a drunk and high butterfly
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
Randomize
