Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Well the police had to intervene and I couldn't exactly feel my legs by the end of the night, but I'd say it was a successful Friday night.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Druken naked yoga : jus another ploy to keep your husbands eye in check
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
Randomize