with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
I just want to hang out with her.
You're a liar. Why do I have to give you reasons you can't have sex with my mom? I hate you.
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
He can sense you did cocaine and had park sex with a large ginger from Australia last night.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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