I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
fyi, i just bought my first strap-on. the little mermaid theme song was playing in the background.
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
no. you can't hotbox the world.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
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