sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
Lost is over, my longest committed relationship is coming to an end.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
it's like heaven, but drunker
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
Randomize