hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
Thats how high i was. The fact that he looked like Seth Rogan was apparently a good thing.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I'm committing myself to dance. Also, I'm unsure if you said space party sounded lame because dude was old, but I hope you're over it because I love space, and I love David Bowie and I love to dance, and you need to embrace this with me.
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Pooping to opera.
Randomize
