I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
And my only real exposure to Russian culture is you and Internet porn.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
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