yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
She accidentally pre-ordered us Dominos for the next day at 11:30am... we were very confused when we woke up.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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