belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
He told me he loved me mid lick. Anyone that can look at me from that angle, lick my vagina, and say they love me must absolutely mean it
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
My drug dealer just asked me to go see Les Mis on Christmas. Should I be worried this is some type of musical set-up?
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
I'm gonna take a nap by the fireplace and pretend like I know what day it is.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I don't think he knows you can have sex sober...
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
I think I recall josh coming in to the room to tuck us in and give us a few condoms and I threw them back all furious and told him 'we don't use those.' Oh god
Randomize