Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Gotta love hanging with Nat. By the time guys realize she isnt going home with them, they've spent enough money and time to think I'm a good idea.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Did I tell you I’m going on a date? His name is Michael and we both like dinosaurs and anal.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
I deleted your number after I found out you gave my brother head for drugs.
Randomize
