Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
New carpet is nice. I'm making carpet angels. Like a fresh snowfall.
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
Dude where are you? I've been here an hour and all I've done is get head from a random in the stairwell.
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
And then he served me a piece of a brownie on his dick. It tasted amazing. Such a good night!
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
Randomize