Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
my neighbors garage sale is really cutting into the time of day when i can smoke weed on my deck.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
I like how you were offering me $50 last night to come home with you to take care of you and your dog
I woke up in an ill fitting childs tutu this morning and the shower curtain is knocked down. Wtf happened?
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Randomize
