So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize
