is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
already putting money aside for 4/20. you ready for the greatest tuesday ever?
Of course my walk of shame coincided with the alumni marathon on campus. But, I did get a thumbs up from the woman handing out water.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
Did the vodka turn my hair yellow or did something else happen last night?
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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