Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
The dentist just called my mother to confirm the appointment that I made on his answering machine at 4:33 am this morning..
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
When a guy wants to eat something off you and then comes back with microwaved strudel and custard, back the fuck out. I have apple-chunk burns on my tits.
I can't be here...my therapist just watched me take tequila shots
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
I'm sitting at my kitchen table alone dressed as a dinosaur smoking bowls in the dark. Is this rock bottom? Or is this living the dream? Who's to say
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Randomize
