We fucked standing up with my right leg over his shoulder. Thank you mom and dad for having once enrolled me in gymnastics. It has finally paid off
doing lines of blow through a tampon applicator in the study lounge at 7am so i can finish an italian composition that was due a week and a half ago...such a good student.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
There are a bunch of guys at the door looking for the guy you brought back to the condo...pretended not to speak English. You're welcome.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
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