As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
Call me when you wake up. I wanna start drinking but I'm giving up hope on my life if I drink alone before 10 am
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
My pupils are so HUGE you can see into my soul from 2 miles away
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
You were laying in a hotel bed drinking beer from a straw while you demanded everyone to kiss your foot tattoo.
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
