Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
I wana party with Kermit the frog, no wait. Fozzy the bear. He's probably a silly bitch when he's drunk.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
I just had to ask my drug dealer to "keep it simple for me". Is this a new low?
We've done worse things
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
Randomize
