You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
i just traded a sweatshirt for margaritas... why did they ever stop using the barter system??!!
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
