Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
Four times in one night? That Energizer bunny outfit lived up to the hype.
I just hit on a guy in a doughnut store... is that too suggestive?
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
Randomize
