the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Just so you know, a 6'7" tall gay man, with a martini in one hand and a fairy wand in the other, is not a force to be reckoned with...don't ask.
Sorry about the picture of wills balls via snapchat last night btw
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
I didn't know what to say so I just sent him a chicken emoji
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
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